I think the thing you do most when you are pregnant is just that – Think. While your laying on the couch, waiting at the doctors, and all those times you can’t go to sleep from heartburn, insomnia, or being kicked in the ribs. You day dream, you think about names, colors, what you want to eat next. And if your like me you forget half the thing you thought about, so you think about them some more. Just like now, I had more of an out line in mind for this post. Then I started typing the third sentence. Oh well, lets just see where this goes.
At 8 months I can feel things starting to end…although I’ll state it here and now I don’t see it as an end at all, but just another wonderfully exciting phase. Sure I wont be pregnant anymore (until round 2…and I see no reason to rush) but I’ll still be just as much of a mother as I am now. I’ll still have a growing baby to love, and feed, and hold, and care for, and adore. But soon I’ll get to see that beautiful face as often as I want. And I’ll be able to see her grow with my own eyes. Touch my fingers to hers, give her kisses. Yes just this phase is ending, and I’m growing more excited for what is to come. I will say I’m glad I decided to have my shower so close to my due date…or was that really my idea? Humm I don’t remember, but it doesn’t mater, I’m just glad my mind has a high lighted place to stop between this point and labor. I’m excited to see what some of our dearest friends and family have picked our for our baby, and I’m excited to see those smiling faces. Plus a party just sounds fun at this point. I’ve been pretty tired, and a real home body. So a day of change sounds nice. I even plan to wear something other then my husbands boxers.
Now as I said that is something I’m using to distract my self from thinking too much about labor. Not because I’m worried, or nervous even in the slightest bit. I’m looking forward to labor. Yep you read that right. And an all natural labor at that! There was a point when the thought did make me nervous, after all I’ve never done this before. But somewhere along the way after praying with God this calm confidence has swept over me. And I look forward to it because I know I can do all thing through Christ who strengthens me. I trust God, I believe in my self, and I want to see my baby face to face. I’d like to add that with ever week that goes by not only do I feel more confident about labor, but all my desires as a mother. With everything from breastfeeding, and co-sleeping, to homeschooling and more. And having such a supportive husband (whom I thank God for) is an added boost to my confidence. Now I hope no one mistakes this as me being cocky. I know I’ve got a lot to learn, and learn I shall. But I know who and what I want to be as a mother. And that my friends is a very wonderful feeling.